All the Wedding Planning Details… Part 1
I'm detailing my wedding planning journey to give brides a glimpse into the reality of planning a wedding while everyone continues on with their normal lives. Even the groom! Shocking, isn’t it? If you’re a bride-to-be, the next few months, or years, will consist of event planning and people handling. There are tons of decisions to make and plenty of people to piss-off in the process.
I just booked a wedding planner a few weeks ago. Up until then, I was doing it myself (with help from others). Our venue requires a planner, but I also wanted a professional’s input to tie it all together. I’ve loved this process. Mine has been a bit longer than necessary, but I also knew from the start that I wanted to take my time. That being said, I note in the timeline below where I really didn’t do much planning at all. I label those months Casual Planning and Extremely Casual Planning.
December 2023 through February 2024 [Extremely Casual Planning]
December 20, 2023 - We’re engaged!
Planning took a backseat and we took the holidays to enjoy our engagement and tell our families. Of course there were some informal chats about the wedding, but nothing serious.
December 30, 2023 - I found my dress.
Legit 10 days after we got engaged, I purchased my wedding dress. This is not the norm and it was completely spur of the moment. I had never tried on dresses before and wanted to go and see what it was like. I didn’t make an appointment anywhere because I didn’t even know places requirement appointments. I ended up at Nicole Bridal in Abington. They graciously let us in without an appointment and as they were literally about to close. When I tried on the dress, we all knew it was perfect. It was ordered that same day.
February 3, 2024 - Our engagement party ♥
Once we decided to have an engagement party, planning efforts went there. However, my family did a lot of this planning, so it’s not like the engagement party planning took us away from wedding planning. We were still just enjoying the engagement.
March 2024 through May 2024 [Casual Planning]
March 2024 - Where should we get married?
I already knew when I wanted to get married. August 16th is my grandparents’ anniversary and I’ve wanted that date/weekend for as long as I can remember. Where we would get married was the trickier question. I’m from Philly and Zach is from Baltimore. Since both of us have family and friends who live all over the country, a “local” wedding wasn’t really possible. People would be likely traveling no matter what, including Zach and I unless we had the wedding in NYC. We decided to consider Charleston, South Carolina more seriously. It was a mutual spot with a little bit of meaning for us since we met at the University of South Carolina—at least that is what we tell people when they ask “why Charleston?” Even without the USC connection, I like to think I still would have considered Charleston. It is such a gorgeous, charming town. My mom, my cousin, and I visited one venue in north Jersey sometime in mid-March or early April. It was gorgeous and I was seriously considering it. It is called Perona Farms.
May 2024 - We decided on Charleston, officially.
My mom and I went to Charleston the first weekend in May. We had about four venues to see over two days. But once we saw The Dewberry, it was game over. We ended up canceling on at least one of the other venue visits. The other venues were stunning, but they were more outside of the city of Charleston. The Dewberry was a bit more modern but with a classic charm that was very Charleston, and very me. The venue was officially booked around May 15th. They had our date available, August 16, but decided to go for the Friday before. We figured it would give us Saturday to spend more time with friends and family without the pressure of the wedding.
Money Saving Tips
Friday weddings are cheaper than Saturday weddings, sometimes significantly. As Friday weddings become more and more normal, guests really don’t bat an eye about the mid-week event.
See if your wedding destination has an off-season. August in Charleston is the off-season because of the heat (I think). Our wedding is only about two weeks away from their high-season. That two-week difference can save you lots of money.
April 2024 - Kinda spontaneous engagement photos.
We also did our engagement photos in April during a trip we had already planning to the British Virgin Islands. We took one hour out of our week there and found a local photographer. We still are considering NYC engagement photos when the city defrosts. I dedicated an entire post to the engagement photos if you want more details.
June 2024 - July 2024 [Extremely Causal Planning]
In June, we booked our videographer! Other than that, we just enjoyed our summer.
My Unsolicited Advice
Brides, do not feel pressured to make everything a big event that requires a new white outfit or everyone’s attendance.
Zach did not come to any of the venues. It was hard to schedule a time that worked for both of us plus the parents who are footing the bill. On top of that, Zach still have never seen the venue. I sent videos and asked for his input during the venue search, but it wouldn’t have made a difference if I didn’t. I sent him an Instagram Reel of the venue a few months ago, long after it was booked. His response was “Nice. Where is that?” So don’t stress yourself trying to work around everyone’s schedule. Focus on you, and whoever is writing the check. If others can make it, and you want them there, the more the merrier.
Aug. 2024 — Real Planning Starts
Aug. 2024 - Why was the guest list the hardest part?
Toward the end of August, I started looking into save the date designs, finalizing our guest list, and making a wedding website. The guest list is hard. You have to make sure everyone’s name is spelled correctly and get their addresses. You’d be shocked how many names you have spelled wrong in your phone.
A major help was asking everyone to give us their mailing information when they RSVP’d to our engagement party. Paperless Post is an e-vite platform and they offer a variety of RSVP options that require the guests to submit certain information before they can submit their response. This was incredibly helpful.
Sept. 2024 - Nvm. Finding stamps that weren’t hideous was the hardest.
I ordered the save the dates in the beginning of September. I made sure our wedding website was up and running before we sent out our save the dates so I could include an early RSVP section on the wedding website. It is not a formal RSVP, but just a place for people who already know they cannot make the trip to let us know.
As for why the postage has been the hardest part of wedding planning… We went to the Hamptons with friends toward the end of September and while Zach golfed I visited what felt like every post office on Long Island to find stamps that did not bear the American flag, leaves, or each state’s official animal. I eventually found a pretty floral pattern.
To be continued…
